AN ENGINEER GOES TO HELL:
An engineer dies and suddenly finds himself standing at the Pearly Gates, in front of Saint Peter who’s holding a clipboard.
Saint Peter takes a few moments to review his list and then says to the engineer, “I’m sorry old boy but you’re not on the list. That means you’ll have to go down below I’m afraid.”
The engineer is a little disheartened but trudges off in search of the gates to Hell.
When he arrives in Hell he’s less than impressed. It’s hot, it’s smelly and it’s very miserable.
However being an engineer, he’s very resourceful. So immediately he decides to take action to improve his situation.
He realises that if he’s to be comfortable he must do something about the heat. So he decides to install air conditioning. Once he gets that working, everything cools down quite quickly and it’s all a little bit more pleasant.
Installing the air conditioning proved to be thirsty work but there aren’t any cold drinks. So the engineer decides to install refrigeration and before you know it everyone in Hell is able to relax with a cold beer.
When he’s got everyone cool and the beer cold, the engineer realises they don’t have any entertainment. So he decides to install cable television. Before you know it they’re all enjoying hundreds of television channels.
Suddenly life in Hell is getting quite pleasant and the engineer is becoming a popular guy. Well why wouldn’t he be? He’s constantly using his skills to make life better for everyone.
Anyway, one day, God has reason to phone the Devil. Needless to say, God can’t resist having a little fun at the Devil’s expense.
“So how’s it all going down there Devil? Still hot and miserable?” says God.
To which the Devil replies, “Well actually things are great down here right now. Since you sent us that engineer we’ve been able to upgrade our facilities substantially.“
God is annoyed and cannot conceal his irritation, saying, “What? You’ve got an engineer? How did that happen? There’s always a place for engineers up here in Heaven, we need their skills. There must be some mistake”
Now it’s the Devil who feels he’s the one who can have a little fun and he responds with a laugh, “Well he’s here with us now and we’re pleased to have him.”
“Send him up here right now.” Says God,
The Devil’s having none of it, and he responds, “No way! We’re keeping him. He’s far too useful to let go.“
God decides it’s time to apply a little pressure, so he says, “Look Devil, either you send him up here to me immediately or I’ll have no choice but to sue you!“
The Devil falls about laughing and says, “Where will you find a lawyer?“
